Who Are You?
If that’s the question you’re after, you came to the right place. I find it odd that a lot of people don’t create websites using their name as the URL. For instance, if you are a big fan of Dick Van Patten one would think that the best resource for information on one of the greatest actor’s of all time could be found at dickvanpatten.com, but alas, no website exists. That is why I created this site. For everything that is to be known about Dick Van Patten, can be found in these pages.
My Life Story
My life began sometime between the first re-release of “Raider’s of the Lost Ark” (July 16, 1982) and the second re-release of “Raider’s of the Lost Ark” (March 25, 1983). Nobody really knows for certain.
I grew up with a passion for the arts. I have been told that as a child prodigy I performed songs from Disney’s “Pinocchio” from our garage. The audience found the performance to be groundbreaking. Speaking of Prodigy and my childhood, I also recorded a remix of “Smack My Bitch Up” that I titled “Punch Teddy Ruxpin Till His Mouth Stops Moving.” This came to be the first remix ever recorded before the song was written. Unfortunately, the master cassette fell into the clutches of a jar of grape jelly and has not been heard since.
As a troubled teenager I found sollace in drawing. My whimsical humorist style often suggested that I was on drugs and very horny. Which was only partly true. All of these drawings were done in my school notebooks on a medium called paper. Paper was big in the 1960’s when amatuer chemists would dip it into chemicals, cut it into little squares at sell them as “acid.” This “acid” was reported to have dangerous mind altering effects that would drive people to the brink of insanity. Today to quell the general public’s fear of these substances, most paper is marked “acid free.”
During most of my formative years I was involved with the notion of using a camera and video tape to produce what is most commonly called drivel. Growing up in a society rich with menonite virtues, one piece of drivel was mistaken for pornography and literaly created hours of controversy.
After a well planned dashing escape from youthful abandon that looked oddly familar to a high school graduation, I found myself in a delima: I didn’t have a car, I didn’t have a job and I didn’t want to go to college. So I felt that indefinite unemployment was the most logical option. I devoted most of my time during this phase to the development of open source software projects. Open Source loosely translated means that a bunch of snot nosed elitists feel they can create a better product than the big software companies. In the end they can’t so they give their software away for free and ask people to donate money to keep the project going, but people don’t because the software sucks. The elitists say that they give it away for free because they feel that all computer software should be made available to everyone and not limited by the bounds of strict lincenses and hefty price tags, but really they give it away for free because nobody in their right mind will pay for crap. Especially crap that sucks.
Presently I spend my days discussing technical issues pertaining to media creation, drinking lots of water and water-based products, and occasionally doing website design, graphic design and video editing.